


Rugged

by MemesByTheFoot



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Crack, Deliberate Badfic, M/M, its all a joke no one is in character, like this is jsut. it doesnt. make any sense., literally i. dont know what happened, this is a joke, trollfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-23
Updated: 2016-10-23
Packaged: 2018-08-24 03:31:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8355373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MemesByTheFoot/pseuds/MemesByTheFoot
Summary: this is a joke im sorr y





	

Hanzo walked into the dining room, later than usual. The whole team sat around him, smiling and laughing. Hnazo sneered. He was much too cool for those fucking losers. He ignored them as they called him over, and went on his way. Just then, he ran into a ruggedly rugged man with ruggedly handsome looks.

“Well how dun’ git ya in mah way, darlin’?” the man drawled southernly and homosexually. He smirked.

“Hmph,” Hazno grunted. This man clearly had a way with words. Hzano couldn’t bear to look up at him (not because he was so ruggedly handsome but because the sun was shining through the window behind him so if he looked up at the man then the sun would shine in his face and its like is father told him when he was younger: “if you look up at the sun too much then the sun will hurt your eyes and it will not be very pleasant for you. Now go kill your brother”).

He pushed past the man’s broad, rugged, hairy, muscled, toned, rugged body and went on his way to the training room to shoot some arrows into training robots. (It always helped to calm him, and also settle the need for the kill that rushed through his veins because hes angsty and shit). Just then he heard a deep, scratchy voice from behind him.

“Well ain’t ya prettier than a pickle on a pickle patch on a Sunday in a field by a cow under the sun in October with 42 unsullied virgins havin’ a blood sacrifice?”

The man’s western idiom confused Hnaznao, but the man’s looks were so rugged that Hno felt ruggedly charmed.

“I am practicing shooting my arrows out of my bow. What do you want, noon man?” snapped the archery man, as he hit three bulls’ eyes all on one target.

“Im here ta practice shootin’ them there targets with this gun what here I call peacekeeper.” responded the tractor fucker.

Hanzo couldn’t respond, he was too busy admiring the Western Gay Man. His beard covered a portion of his face, similar to Hanzo’s beard which covered a portion of his face as well. The rugged man wore a Stetson that looked like it had been hand sewn in a factory that profited off of the exploitation of children in a country such as China or India. That is to say, the handiwork was shabby at best and it was clearly cheaply made. The light emitting from the blue nipple spots on the cowboy’s chest armor illuminated his rugged face beautifully. Then, Hanzo realized he didn’t even know the name of this hunk.

“What is your name, Mr Cowboy Man?” asked Hanzo. The rugged man chuckled.

“Name’s McCree. Jesse Pinkman Heisenberg Walter White McCree.”

Hanzo was stunned. He had never heard a name as beautiful as this one. It fit the man ruggedly well.

That night, as Hanzo was going back to his room, he ran into Genji. Fucking Genji. Couldn’t stay dead, that little fucker.

“Ah, Brother, I See You Have Met McCree!” said Genji happily. Ugh. Why did Genji have to capitalize everything that came out of his mouth? Zenyatta was a bad influence.

“Yes. I hate him,” replied Hanzo, clearly lying.

“You Are Clearly Lying,” Genji pointed out. “But No Matter. I Have Already Slept With Him. Sorry, My Brother.”

Hanzo drove an arrow once again straight into the heart of his unsuspecting brother.

**Author's Note:**

> i think im funny. also this is the first thing ive ever posted here, its a pretty fancy website


End file.
